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Thursday, March 8, 2012

How To Get An Ex Back Even If They Say Never

By Maria Babenko


As you have probably already figured out, getting your ex back is no simple task. But you need to understand that your own emotions may have a lot to do with the outcome. Your ex is very important to you and you worry about doing the wrong thing. On the flip side, the one you love has rejected you and this has destroyed your self confidence. The stress is unbelievably high and the truth is that you might not be in the best position at this very moment to get your ex back.

Getting your life back together and rebuilding your confidence needs to be a priority for you right now. Before you do anything else, you need to know in your heart that you can do this. Me telling you what to do to get your ex back just isn't going to bring them back to you. Without the some confidence in yourself and your relationship you're just not going to be able to pull this off no matter how clever the tricks are that I teach you. Even armed with the most cunning secrets to success, your lack of faith might actually further push your ex away from you instead of drawing them near.

Admitting that you're having a hard time is a step in the right direction. Knowing that you made a mistake of contributed to the downfall of our relationship is important to you but it is not important in the beginning stages of getting your ex back. Your ex simply isn't going to listen to a thing that you ahve to say. Being nice and accomodating or apologizing is going to fall on deaf ears right now. You might get frustrated and want to just walk away but just hang with me here for a minute.

Right now you're carring around a bunch of emotional baggage. Getting your ex back is a pretty simple process but it is the guilt over what your ex says you did to cause the breakup that is killing you and the doubt that you can actually get them back that is crippling you right now. What your ex says was the cause of your breakup has nothing to do with why you are apart right now no matter what they say so stop dwelling upon what they said you did wrong. I don't care how horrible it was. It can be overcome. You need to move past this yourself and understand what is actually going on. You are just too close to the situation and too emotionally involved to be making good decisions right now. Let go of that guilt and set yourself free to get them back because in time nobody is going to remember what you did. Not even your ex, I promise.

This emotional baggage that you are holding onto along with the pain that you are experiencing might cause you to make rash decisions based upon your own pain. You might have severe ups and downs for a while until things level out. You could be at the top, knowing without a doubt that you can and will get them back and then an hour later feel like "reality" has set in and feel a wash of depression that catapults you into a pit of dispair. Then an hour later you get a bright idea to call your ex and tell them something that you are sure will turn things around. Then what happens? Your ex rejects you or hangs up the phone on you and you're worse off than you were before.

Knowing what to do to get your ex back is simple. Actually doing those things can require nerves of steel because you are going against every instinct that you have of self preservation that tells you what you think is the right thing to do. Having someone who has been through this trail and knows what you are going through is vital. Listening to the advice of someone that has successfully pulled their relationship from the depths of hell can help you to see that this can be done and how to do it. All of this will save you time and further emotional scarring and you will have the emotional support that you need to get your ex back.

This isn't going to be a walk in the park. There are times when you're just going to have to lock your phone away in a safe place or turn off the computer and entertain yourself with a funny movie or a long walk while the temptation to contact your ex passes but it is often better to do nothing than to do the wrong thing that will further alienate your ex from you while you get your head together. Knowing what to do to get your ex back goes against every instinct that you have but if you are patient and you understand the basics of relationship dynamics you can and will get your ex back




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