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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Making Up Just After Breaking Up Isn't Always Easy, Nonetheless It Certainly Can Be Done

By V K Rajagopalan


If you and the one you desire have lately split, making up probably ranks big on your agenda. The truly amazing news is that most failed relationships can be mended, providing you adhere to a few very simple rules.

To begin with, it is important for you to forget all about any negative advice you may have been given. Frequently, when couples split up, their wellwishers advise them to move on, and tell them it's a good idea to find some other person.

Of course your friends don't mean any harm, and are of course only seeking to be supportive, but if the person you broke up with really meant the world to yourself, then why shouldn't you try to patch the romance? Do you really want to find a new partner? Making up is probably not easy and simple option, but it's most certainly not the most difficult option either.

As I've already said, you may have to follow a few proven rules. By way of example, don't even consider playing the blame game. Even if you are convinced your partner was responsible for the break-up, let it be.

Now is the time for ironing out your differences and for identifying exactly what caused the split. Remember, there are two sides to every coin. Sure, if you caught your ex partner having an affair, then you have rightful reasons to feel upset, and yes, you do have the right to point a finger, but that won't mend your relationship. If you can't forgive, then you honestly need to walk away.

The next most essential rule is for you to give your ex some space. Quite simply, don't start phoning them all the time, and don't send them text messages constantly either. Permit them a little time to reflect on what has happened.

Phoning them or texting them all the time will be sure to make you look desperate, and besides, the continual harassment will likely push them even further away. You also don't want to be bumping into them out of the blue every single day. They'll know you're doing it intentionally, and you'll without doubt find they'll soon make an effort to avoid you as much as possible.

Appearing desperate is most certainly not the way to go. Instead, you have to adopt a mature approach. Give your ex a bit of time, and after that begin slowly. Even when the both of you do make arrangements to meet up, offer to meet your wife/husband in a public area. It will make her or him feel more at ease and it definitely will also minimize the risk of any angry outbursts.

Remember, when you go to meet your wife/husband, you're doing it because making up is vital to you personally. If you were mostly to blame for the breakup, allow them to realize that you're prepared to change, but if you ex was mostly to blame, you have to allow them to apologize when they're ready. In the mean time, just let them understand that you believe the both of you can work things out, and that there's nobody on earth you'd rather be with.




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