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Friday, April 27, 2012

Find Out The Secrets Of How To Solve Problems In Marriage

By Greg Deetz


All couples struggle and all couples suffer problems. As such, all couples will need to know how to solve problems in marriage without the type of struggle that worsens the married woes. The happiest couples appear to be the ones who face their differences and regularly struggle over their problems. But the conflict between divorced couples and cheerful couples is that the latter know how to struggle fair, struggle positive and struggle in a loving manner even when the problems seem to be insurmountable for the formers' standards. Here are the ways that you can solve marital problems without the destructive fights that might lead to the dissolution of your union.

Agree to Disagree During the early on stages of your relationship and well into your betrothal, you must have learned the primary principle of how to lick problems in marriage without destructive fights - agree to disagree. Even when you are insanely, crazily and helplessly in love with each other, you will get personality quirks, habits and attributes that the other will not like, much less enjoy. But that does not mean that you do not love and you are not in love with each other either. You will merely have to become skilled at agree to disagree. You will strive to realize the other person's point of view according to his past experiences, present expectations and next aspirations in the same way that you also want your partner to see your own point of view. When you have complete understanding on both your sides, you are correctly on your way to adopting the ways how to solve problems in marriage without the little fights.

Check Your Damaging Emotions It is a normal human reaction to slash out against an target or subject of damaging emotions from simple frustration to vivid fury. Your spouse may have committed a small transgression like using the credit card for an unnecessary purchase or a big sin like having an extramarital affair. You are justified in your feelings of frustration, madness and other negative emotions as these are all common for humans.

Merely you could not be justified in engaging in a barrage of violent anger, scathing criticism and emotional mangle of your partner. Your spouse will not be expected to just sit back, relax and let the maltreatment prevail for he/she is only human, too. And so the blistering fights start and this is decidedly not the best way how to solve problems in marriage.

Rather than, discuss your marital problems in a calm, cool and composed way. It will be difficult, of course, but you should both work at it because there are no winners in a yelling match - only losers and possibly entertained neighbors that are the only ones getting each of your sides. Simply try to keep your anger levels down and start getting your loving levels upward.



Finally but not least, go for a win-win result. You will not be glad even when you win in a loving struggle but you will be ecstatic when your partner is happy as well. At last, the best way how to solve problems in marriage is to approach these problems as a team and then arrive out as a stronger unit.




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