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Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Suggestions To Save The Marriage You Value A Lot

By Paulina L. Lebrecque

When a number of folks get married in a certain day, others are getting a divorce. It's like when a baby is born, someone else dies. Is it equilibrium doing its work? Maybe. Maybe not. However, one thing is for sure. The treatment of marriage and how people look at it today is far different from what it used to be. Some may see it as a sacred vow but perhaps the majority today doesn't, considering the number of divorce and separation cases in the past few years.

Nowadays, when couples feel that they are on a failing marriage, they tend to just wait for the time they hit rock bottom and would go for a divorce. Sometimes, they don't even wait long enough to hit the ground. They start processing their legal separation already without considering that may be, just may be, there are branches from their relationship that they can cling to and can save their fall. Where's the effort to keep your marriage? Sad to say, most couples don't even care.

Here are four ways or tips to save the marriage you think is worth keeping:

Stop yelling In order to save the marriage that's worth a lot to you, you and your spouse need to calm yourselves down and stop yelling whenever the two of you are in a heated argument. What's the point in screaming? Do you feel good if you can overshadow the other's voice? Whatever happened to talking it all out in a cool manner? That way, you can clearly hear each other's sentiments. No need for screaming.

Avoid conflicts Although arguments and some fights are part of a married couple's life, you should still try to avoid conflicts as much as possible especially those that don't make sense. For instance, if you see your partner is having a rough day, perhaps you should avoid doing things that may piss him/her off even more. A little consideration for each other can help end or prevent unnecessary conflicts.

Visit your marriage counselor You have to remember that there are others out there whose work is to help you save the marriage you cherish the most. Making appointments with a marriage counselor and seeking help from him/her have worked for some of our married couples. This doesn't totally guarantee that it will work on you and your partner's case but it's worth a shot, right?

Enhance communication One factor that can damage your relationship with your partner is if the two of you aren't good listeners. It also doesn't help if you are only hearing what you want to hear from your spouse. Both of you should try your best to communicate with each other effectively. Have some random conversations. Spend some time talking about things.

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