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Thursday, March 3, 2011

Can This Marriage Be Saved?

By Matt E Taylor


'Can this marriage be saved' is a question on the lips of many people who appear to be going through the breakdown of their relationship with their spouse. Divorce rates are rocketing and many people accept divorce as the natural finish to a marriage, as a substitute of expecting to be collectively till demise components them. On this climate, divorce is often the easy manner out.

However, just the fact that you are asking 'can this marriage be saved' is already a very positive sign. Sadly, more and more people these days opt for divorce without even considering whether their marriage might be sustainable.

Even within the case of any individual who could be very sad about the breakdown of their marriage, they often accept a divorce with out question. It's possible you'll even hear friends and family members advising you to neglect it and transfer on. Do not take heed to this recommendation till you are positive that there is actually no probability of a future in your marriage.

Sadly, this is without doubt one of the biggest reasons for the rise in divorce rates over the previous few years. Do you think that there were no affairs, arguments or different issues in marriages 20 years in the past? No, marriage was just as difficult then as it's today. Individuals just did not surrender on their relationships so fast.

So can this marriage be saved? Effectively first, f you each wish to save it, then your marriage is sort of certainly recoverable. You will have to do some work with a counselor and perhaps settle for being extra sincere and trusting of each other. You might have to work on feelings that have arisen due to an affair on one or either side, or different issues. But so long as you encourage each other to put the marriage at the top of your checklist of priorities, you may have every probability of succeeding.

If it seems that you are the only one who wants to save the marriage while your partner wants a divorce, you will have a harder task on your hands. But it is still possible.

You can remind your partner of the reasons that both of you should try to save the marriage. There may be children. And whatever problems the two of you have, the same problems are likely to come up again in your next relationships unless you treat this as an opportunity to work on them and solve them now.

Remind your partner that 'starting over' often just means getting a chance to repeat the same mistakes. There is no point in running away from problems in a marriage. Instead, see them as an opportunity to work together, learn and grow. If you can do this, you may end up with a happier and stronger marriage than you ever had before.

Lastly, watch out not to connect an excessive amount of significance to falling in love. Simply because considered one of you has fallen in love with someone else does not imply that divorce and remarriage has to follow. Many individuals fall in and out of affection regularly. Even when it appears revolutionary, think about accepting this with out allowing it to destroy your marriage.

In the end, solely you can answer the query 'Can this marriage be saved




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